Sunday, August 23, 2009

Times have certainly changed.

Boy, when I was seven, cautiously printing with my Primary Printer No.1 Pencil in my lock and key diary with with the carousel on the front, I never thought I'd one day be typing my thoughts on a computer, much less on the world wide web for everyone to see.  So much for the lock and key.  After being inspired by the blogs of a few friends, I have finally succumb to this phenomenon called blogging.  I have refrained from the whole blogging thing since I first heard about it because a) facebook is enough of a time sucker, and because b) who really cares about what I have to say?  But, having a husband that works long shifts and a two year old whose conversations are focused mainly on his lunch menu, his current favourite movie, and how to use the potty, I can now totally understand why people, specifically young moms like myself, turn to blogging.

So, for what its worth, these are my thoughts.  Read them or don't read them.  Doesn't matter to me.  I said that this year I wanted to stretch myself and to do something outside of my comfort zone, this would certainly be it.


Be sure to close the door behind you.

As a little girl, the words "turn out the lights" and "close the door behind you" were etched into my mind on a daily basis.  At the time, it meant just that.  Occasionally, it meant a second trip back to where I was, to do what I had forgotten to do.  This week, I've come to realize that "turn out the lights and close the door behind you" can really be an analogy for so much more.

My son has a strange obsession with closing things.  If Jonah were a girl I'd say, "well, she's just like her momma".  But, for a boy, this surprises me somewhat, considering the only real experience with little boys I've had was my little brother, and, well, lets just say he didn't share the same passion for closing things, as Jonah.  It can be rather frustrating when I'm trying to prepare supper and he's constantly shutting the pantry door on me, or, when I'm loading up the cupboard under the bathroom sink with toilet paper and he manages to shut the door 5 times before I'm done.  He barely finishes peeing before he slams the toilet seat and lid shut.  And, forget trying to load the wet laundry into the dryer when he's around, that's just too tempting.  This has all led to Jonah's newest catch phrase "not yet".  I guess I've been saying it a lot lately.

Or, perhaps I've been saying it a lot longer than I realize.  I'm not one to give up too quickly and quit something without finishing it, even if it takes me a really long time.  I guess that's why that six inches of knitting that was supposed to be a scarf has been sitting in my craft drawer since I was nine.

So, almost 10 years ago when I began a journey, a dream really, I was going to see it through to the end.  I didn't think it would take quite this long, but there were plenty of twists and turns, and ups and downs along the way - a marriage, a baby, a business, inner struggles, emotions, and failures, and moving from the city I had called home my entire life.  But, this was something I just had to see through to the end, no matter what.  Reading back through my baby book this morning, my mom refered to this characteristic as 'stubborness'.  I like to call it tenacity.

There were many detours along this journey, but thank the Lord for detours, because without them, we'd miss out on all the beautiful scenery and souvenirs, not to mention all the wonderful people we meet along the way who end up having a significant impact on your life.

This summer, I'm overjoyed (and quite relieved) to finally close a door that has been swinging in the breeze for quite some time.  I've finally finished the last of my ARCT teacher's exams and will be officially graduating in January.  I've had friends become doctors in less than the time I've been working away at this, but I'm okay with that.  I don't think it really matters how long the journey takes, as long as you reach the destination.  So be encouraged, if you are on a journey where the road seems so long you feel you won't ever 'get there', you will.  Just be sure to put on the windshield wipers when you need to and stop for a car wash every now an then.  And, most of all, try not to let your spiritual gas tank run empty, though, try as we may, we all do now and then. 

When you get out of the car at the end of your journey, be sure to turn out the head lights and close the door behind you.  And, if you are someone who has left the lights on and a door open somewhere in your life, may I remind you to go back, turn them out, and close the door behind you.  Its never too late.